What do you call two birds in love?
Why was Karl Marx buried at Highgate Cemetery in London?
Because he was dead.animalcleanfunnyshort
What has a head like a cat, feet like a cat, a tail like a cat, but isn't a cat?
When a girl slips on the ice, why can't her brother help her up?
He can't be a brother and assist her (a sister).cleanshort
Which one of Santa's reindeer can be seen on Valentines day?
What is the last thing you take off before bed?
Your feet off the floor.animallogicmath
There are several chickens and rabbits in a cage (with no other types of animals). There are 72 heads and 200 feet inside the cage. How many chickens are there, and how many rabbits?
Let c be the number of chickens, and r be the number of rabbits.
r + c = 72
4r + 2c = 200
To solve the equations, we multiply the first by two, then subtract the second.
2r + 2c = 144
2r = 56
r = 28
c = 44
So there are 44 chickens and 28 rabbits in the cage.
What is a sick crocodile?
I can swim or walk for miles.
I’m big with thick, white hair.
I live up in the Arctic.
What I am?
A hobo had just been kicked off the train by one of the bosses. As he made his way down a dusty side road, he noticed a saffron robed man sitting next to a campfire apparently deep in thought. A wonderful smelling stew was bubbling in a pot next to him. It had been a full day since the hobo's last meal, so he went over to the man and tapped him on the shoulder.
"I see by your robes that you are some kind of holy man," said the hobo.
The Zen Master turned to the hobo and said, "You speak the truth."
The hobo spoke, "I would sure like to try the stew you have on the campfire there; perhaps if I could tell you something to increase your wisdom, you will agree to share your meal."
The Zen Master turned to the hobo and said, "Please, you are welcome to share my meal because you have already increased my wisdom!"
What had the Zen Master learned from the hobo to increase his wisdom?
The Zen Master learned that he should find a more privace place to meditate if he doesn't want to be interrupted by every vagabond that happens by.