## Little dog's favorite drink

What is a little dog's favorite drink?

Pupsi-cola.

What is a little dog's favorite drink?

Pupsi-cola.

A Panda Bear walked into a restaurant. He sat down at a table and ordered some food. When he was finished eating, he took out a gun and shot his waiter. He then left the restaurant.After the police caught up with him, they asked him why he had killed the waiter.He replied, "Look me up in the dictionary." What did the dictionary say?

When they looked up the word "Panda" in the dictionary, it stated, "Panda: Eats shoots and leaves."

What do you call 2 octopuses that look exactly the same?

Itenticle.

A farmer lived in a small village. He had three sons. One day he gave $100 dollars to his sons and told them to go to market. The three sons should buy 100 animals for $100 dollars. In the market there were chickens, hens and goats. Cost of a goat is $10, cost of a hen is $5 and cost of a chicken is $0.50.
There should be at least one animal from each group. The farmer’s sons should spend all the money on buying animals. There should be 100 animals, not a single animal more or less! What do the sons buy?

They purchased 100 animals for 100 dollars.
$10 spent to purchase 1 goat.
$45 spent to purchase 9 hens.
$45 spent to purchase 90 chickens.

What is more impressive than a talking dog?

A spelling bee.

What is the largest ant in the world?

Elephant.

A swan sits at the center of a perfectly circular lake. At an edge of the lake stands a ravenous monster waiting to devour the swan. The monster can not enter the water, but it will run around the circumference of the lake to try to catch the swan as soon as it reaches the shore. The monster moves at 4 times the speed of the swan, and it will always move in the direction along the shore that brings it closer to the swan the quickest. Both the swan and the the monster can change directions in an instant.
The swan knows that if it can reach the lake's shore without the monster right on top of it, it can instantly escape into the surrounding forest.
How can the swan succesfully escape?

Assume the radius of the lake is R feet. So the circumference of the lake is (2*pi*R). If the swan swims R/4 feet, (or, put another way, 0.25R feet) straight away from the center of the lake, and then begins swimming in a circle around the center, then it will be able to swim around this circle in the exact same amount of time as the monster will be able to run around the lake's shore (since this inner circle's circumference is 2*pi*(R/4), which is exactly 4 times shorter than the shore's circumference).
From this point, the swan can move a millimeter inward toward the lake's center, and begin swimming around the center in a circle from this distance. It is now going around a very slightly smaller circle than it was a moment ago, and thus will be able to swim around this circle FASTER than the monster can run around the shore.
The swan can keep swimming around this way, pulling further away each second, until finally it is on the opposite side of its inner circle from where the monster is on the shore. At this point, the swan aims directly toward the closest shore and begins swimming that way. At this point, the swan has to swim [0.75R feet + 1 millimeter] to get to shore. Meanwhile, the monster will have to run R*pi feet (half the circumference of the lake) to get to where the swan is headed.
The monster runs four times as fast as the swan, but you can see that it has more than four times as far to run:
[0.75R feet + 1 millimeter] * 4 < R*pi
[This math could actually be incorrect if R were very very small, but in that case we could just say the swan swam inward even less than a millimeter, and make the math work out correctly.]
Because the swan has less than a fourth of the distance to travel as the monster, it will reach the shore before the monster reaches where it is and successfully escape.

What has two humps and is found at the North Pole?

A lost camel!

What is a sick crocodile?

An ail-ligator.

There are 2 ducks in the front, 1 in the middle, and 2 in the back.... How many are there in total?

3 ducks in 3 rows. First in the front, one in the middle and last in the back.