A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of water. The bartender reaches under the bar and brings out a gun and aims it at the man. The man says thank you and leaves. What happened?
The man had the hiccups and the water helped him stop it, and the gun scared him which also help stop his hiccups as well.
When is a yellow dog most likely to enter a house?
When the door is open.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it was not peeling well.
Why is the sun so bright?
Because it pays attention in the class and does its homework on time.
Whats a sheep's favorite game?
What bird can write?
What do you get if you cross a Beatle and an Australian dog?
Why do elephants have trunks?
Because they'd look silly with handbags.
Why do Chinese men eat more rice than Japanese men do?
There are more Chinese men than Japanese men.
How do you prevent a summer cold?
Catch it in the winter.