Riddle #831

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cleancrazyfunny

Asking the bartender for a glass of water

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of water. The bartender reaches under the bar and brings out a gun and aims it at the man. The man says thank you and leaves. What happened?
The man had the hiccups and the water helped him stop it, and the gun scared him which also help stop his hiccups as well.
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It doesn't matter what you call him, he's not going to come.
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A lemon and an orange were on a high diving board. The orange jumped off. Why didn’t the lemon?
Because it was yellow.
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I am a soldier

I am a soldier and i really hate one month. Which month i am talking about?
March.
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