## Can't open any doors

What has many keys but can't open any doors?

Piano.

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What has many keys but can't open any doors?

Piano.

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A boat has a ladder that has six rungs, each rung is one foot apart. The bottom rung is one foot from the water. The tide rises at 12 inches every 15 minutes. High tide peaks in one hour. When the tide is at it's highest, how many rungs are under water?

None, the boat rises with the tide.

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Two men are in a desert. They're both wearing backpacks. One of the men is dead. The man who is alive, has his pack open. The dead man's pack is closed. What is in their packs?

A parachute.

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Two sentries were on duty outside a barracks. One faced up the road to watch for anyone approaching from the North. The other looked down the road to see if anyone was approached from the South. Suddenly one of them said to the other, "Why are you smiling?" How did he know that his companion was smiling?

Although the guards were looking in opposite directions, they were not back to back. They were facing each other.

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What animal do you think is the best at baseball?

A bat.

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Six glasses are in a row. The first three are filled with milk and the last three are empty. By moving only one glass, can you arrange them so that the full and the empty glasses alternate?

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What do you call two birds in love?

Tweet hearts.

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A bus driver was heading down a street in Colorado. He went right past a stop sign without stopping, he turned left where there was a "no left turn" sign, and he went the wrong way on a one-way street. Then he went on the left side of the road past a cop car. Still - he didn't break any traffic laws.
Why not?

He was walking...not driving.

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A lawyer, a plumber and a hat maker were walking down the street. Who had the biggest hat?

The one with the biggest head.

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Consider the following explanation for why 1=2:
1. Start out Let y = x
2. Multiply through by x xy = x2
3. Subtract y2 from each side xy - y2 = x2 - y2
4. Factor each side y(x-y) = (x+y)(x-y)
5. Divide both sides by (x-y) y = x+y
6. Divide both sides by y y/y = x/y + y/y
7. And so... 1 = x/y + 1
8. Since x=y, x/y = 1 1 = 1 + 1
8. And so... 1 = 2
How is this possible?

Step 5 is invalid, because we are dividing by (x-y), and since x=y, we are thus dividing by 0. This is an invalid mathematical operation (division by 0), and so by not followinng basic mathematical rules, we are able to get strange results like these.

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