Mad Ade's Uncle, Phil Space, who doesn't like what passes for art these days, ran into the National Gallery and caused millions of pounds of damage to several masterpieces. Later that day, Uncle Phil was invited to meet the manager and was warmly thanked for his actions. How come?
Uncle Phil is a fireman The water from his house damaged the paintings as he put out a fire in the Gallery, but in the process rescuing hundreds of millions of pounds worth.
In a major league baseball game, a pitcher faced only 27 batters. Every batter he faced, he struck out. He allowed no hits and no runs, yet his team lost 4-0. How could this be?
He came in as a relief pitcher in the top of first winning with no outs after the dork starting pitcher had already given up four runs!
I am first in Earth, second in Heaven, I appear two times in a week.
You can only see me once in a year, although I'm in the middle of sea.
Who am I?
Answer is E
The asnwer is E. As In spelling of Earth E comes first, in Heaven it comes second, in week it comes twice, in a year it comes once and finally in spelling of sea E stands in middle of the spelling.
Once upon a time there was a dad and 3 kids. When the kids were adults, the dad was old and Death came to take the dad. The first son, who became a lawyer, begged Death to let the dad live a few more years. Death agreed. When Death came back, the second son, who became a doctor begged Death to let his father live a few more days. Death agreed. When Death came back the third son, who became a priest begged Death to let the dad live till that candle wick burned out and he pointed to a candle. Death agreed. The third son knew Death wouldn't come back, and he didn't. Why not?
The third son went over and blew out the candle after Death left because the son said "till the candle wick burns out", not "till the candle burns out".
John Heysham Gibbon was most renowned surgeon of 1940-1970. More than 90% of his surgeries he performed are highly successful and still almost all of his patients die.
The surgery was performed way back, by now approx 90% of them have died by old age.
A bus driver was heading down a street in Colorado. He went right past a stop sign without stopping, he turned left where there was a "no left turn" sign, and he went the wrong way on a one-way street. Then he went on the left side of the road past a cop car. Still - he didn't break any traffic laws.
Why not?
When Manish was three years old he carved a nail into his favorite tree to mark his height. Six years later at age nine, Manish returned to see how much higher the nail was. If the tree grew by five centimeters each year, how much higher would the nail be.
The nail would be at the same height since trees grow at their tops.
