Why did the bee get married?
Because he found his honey.animalcleanfunny
If you see a bird sitting on a twig, how could you get the twig without disturbing the bird?
Wait until the bird flies away.cleanshort
It's red, blue, purple and green. No one can reach it, not even the queen.
I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space.
I am essential to creation, and I surround every place.
The letter "E".cleanshortwhat am I
I am a five letter word and very strong. I become single when you remove two letters from me. What Am I?
A lawyer, a plumber and a hat maker were walking down the street. Who had the biggest hat?
The one with the biggest head.logicshort
Swaff was traveling in an elevator, being cool, when he suddenly heard the cord supporting the elevator snap. Being the cool guy that he is, he knew of a myth where if you could jump at the right time, you could possibly be able to survive a plunge in an elevator.
Now, when Swaff was a boy, he spent all of his math classes making fun of his female teacher's moustache. He never paid attention, so he was a tad bit slow in his mathematical calculations. He did, however, have a very bizarre talent, in which he could tell the exact speed he was traveling. That came in pretty lucky today.
Swaff knew he was falling at an even rate of 50 miles per hour. When the cord snapped, he was exactly 110 feet above the ground. He knew that he must jump at the right time to have any hopes of surviving.
Now, after doing the math, please tell me when Swaff jumped.
He never did. By the time Swaff figured out that he would have to jump in 1.5 seconds, he would already be dead. Not even the best of mathematicians could do all the math needed in 1 and half seconds. Swaff fell to his death.crazyfunnyshort
What did the schizophrenic bookkeeper say?
I hear invoices!cleanlogicshort
How could the cowboy travel on friday, then sleep two days and then travel back home on friday.
If the horse was named Friday.cleanfunnyshort
Why did I throw the butter out of the window?
Because I wanted to see the butterfly.