cleanfunnyshortWhat is a tree's favorite drink?
Root beer.
crazyfunnyshortWhy are televisions attracted to people ?
Because, people turn them on.
cleanshortUntil I am measured I am not known. Yet how you miss me when I have flown.
Time.
funnyshortWhich part of a road do Ghost's love to travel the most?
The Dead End.
logicA man worked for a high-security institution, and one day he went in to work only to find that he could not log in to his computer terminal. His password wouldn't work. Then he remembered that the passwords are reset every month for security purposes. So he went to his boss and they had this conversation:
Man-"Hey boss, my password is out of date."
Boss-"Yes, that's right. The password is different, but if you listen carefully you should be able to figure out the new one: It has the same amount of letters as your old password, but only four of the letters are the same."
Man: "Thanks boss."
With that, he went and correctly logged into his station.
What was the new password?
BONUS: What was his old password?
HINT: It is nine letters long. Also, a "password" can be more than one word...
The old one was: Out of date
The new one is: Different
He said: My password is "Out of date." And the boss told him the new one when he said: "The password is different."
logic Once upon a time there was a dad and 3 kids. When the kids were adults, the dad was old and Death came to take the dad. The first son, who became a lawyer, begged Death to let the dad live a few more years. Death agreed. When Death came back, the second son, who became a doctor begged Death to let his father live a few more days. Death agreed. When Death came back the third son, who became a priest begged Death to let the dad live till that candle wick burned out and he pointed to a candle. Death agreed. The third son knew Death wouldn't come back, and he didn't. Why not?
The third son went over and blew out the candle after Death left because the son said "till the candle wick burns out", not "till the candle burns out".
animalfunnylogicshortIf 20 blackbirds are on a fence and you shoot one, how many remain?
None, they would all fly away from the sound of the shot.
shortwhat am II have 4 eyes, but I cannot see! What Am I?
Mississippi.
cleanWhat does man love more than life,
Fear more than death or mortal strife.
What the poor have, the rich require,
and what contented men desire.
What the miser spends and the spendthrift saves,
And all men carry to their graves?
Nothing.
cleanlogicshortIf you have one pound of rocks and one pound of feathers, which one will weigh more?
They both weigh a pound.
