animalcleanfunnyIf you see a bird sitting on a twig, how could you get the twig without disturbing the bird?
Wait until the bird flies away.
cleanfunnyshortWhy is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?
Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
animalcleanWhat do you call two birds in love?
Tweet hearts.
cleanshortWhy was Karl Marx buried at Highgate Cemetery in London?
Because he was dead.
funnylogicJoe bets Tony $100 that he can predict the score of the football game before it starts. Tony agrees, but loses the bet. Why did Tony lose the bet?
Joe said the score would be 0-0 and he was right. "Before" any football game starts, the score is always 0-0.
animalcleanfunnyshortWhat has a head like a cat, feet like a cat, a tail like a cat, but isn't a cat?
A kitten.
cleanshortWhen a girl slips on the ice, why can't her brother help her up?
He can't be a brother and assist her (a sister).
cleanshortWhich one of Santa's reindeer can be seen on Valentines day?
Cupid.
cleanfunnyWhat did Adam say the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve!
animalcleanshortWhat did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
Ruff.
