animalcleanfunnyWhat is a sick crocodile?
An ail-ligator.
animalshortI can swim or walk for miles.
I’m big with thick, white hair.
I live up in the Arctic.
What I am?
Polar bear.
cleanmathshortDivide 110 into two parts so that one will be 150 percent of the other. What are the 2 numbers?
44 and 66.
logicmathshortCan you make 10 plus 4 = 2?
Yes. 10 o'clock + 4 hours = 2 o'clock.
funnylogicshort A hobo had just been kicked off the train by one of the bosses. As he made his way down a dusty side road, he noticed a saffron robed man sitting next to a campfire apparently deep in thought. A wonderful smelling stew was bubbling in a pot next to him. It had been a full day since the hobo's last meal, so he went over to the man and tapped him on the shoulder.
"I see by your robes that you are some kind of holy man," said the hobo.
The Zen Master turned to the hobo and said, "You speak the truth."
The hobo spoke, "I would sure like to try the stew you have on the campfire there; perhaps if I could tell you something to increase your wisdom, you will agree to share your meal."
The Zen Master turned to the hobo and said, "Please, you are welcome to share my meal because you have already increased my wisdom!"
What had the Zen Master learned from the hobo to increase his wisdom?
The Zen Master learned that he should find a more privace place to meditate if he doesn't want to be interrupted by every vagabond that happens by.
funnylogic "Welcome back to the show. Before the break, Mr Ixolite here made it to our grand finale! How do you feel Mr.Ix?"
"Nervous."
"Okay, now to win the star prize of one million pounds all you have to do is answer the following question in 90 seconds."
"Okay, I'm ready."
"Right. In 90 seconds name 100 words that do NOT contain the letter 'A'. Start the clock!"
Can you help?
One, two, three, four, five...one hundred! I just counted from 1 to 100 in ninety seconds (it is possible).
logicA woman who lived in Germany during World War II wanted to cross the German/Swiss border in order to escape Nazi pursuers. The bridge which she is to cross is a half mile across, over a large canyon. Every three minutes a guard comes out of his bunker and checks if anyone is on the bridge. If a person is caught trying to escape German side to the Swiss side they are shot. If caught crossing the other direction without papers they are sent back. She knows that it takes at least five minutes to cross the bridge, in which time the guard will see her crossing and shoot her. How does she get across?
She waits until the guard goes inside his hunt, and begins to walk across the bridge. She gets a little more than half way, turns around, and begins to walk toward the geman side once more. The guard comes out, sees that she has no papers, and sends her "back" to the swiss side.
crazyfunnyshortWhy are televisions attracted to people ?
Because, people turn them on.
logicWhat is better than presence of mind in an automobile accident?
Absence of body.
cleanlogicYou have two lengths of rope. Each rope has the property that if you light it on fire at one end, it will take exactly 60 minutes to burn to the other end. Note that the ropes will not burn at a consistent speed the entire time (for example, it's possible that the first 90% of a rope will burn in 1 minute, and the last 10% will take the additional 59 minutes to burn).
Given these two ropes and a matchbook, can you find a way to measure out exactly 45 minutes?
The key observation here is that if you light a rope from both ends at the same time, it will burn in 1/2 the time it would have burned in if you had lit it on just one end.
Using this insight, you would light both ends of one rope, and one end of the other rope, all at the same time. The rope you lit at both ends will finish burning in 30 minutes. Once this happens, light the second end of the second rope. It will burn for another 15 minutes (since it would have burned for 30 more minutes without lighting the second end), completing the 45 minutes.
