funnyHow do you get to Carnegie Hall?
Practice, practice, practice.
cleanpoemsshortIt can be cracked, it can be made,
It can be told, it can be played.
What is it?
A joke.
cleanfunnyshortA man takes a barrel that weighs 20 pounds and puts something in it. It now weighs less than 20 pounds. What did he put in the barrel?
He put a hole in the barrel to make it weigh less.
logic Shadow drove into the Speedy Service Station and pulled up to the pumps. "Fill it up, please," said Shadow. "This may sound strange," said the owner, "but I'd rather fill two cars from out of town than one car from this town." Shadow looked across the small town and replied, "I know just what you mean." Why would the owner feel this way?
The owner would rather fill two cars from anywhere than one car from town because he would make twice the amount of money.
logicOnce there was a night watchman who had been caught several times sleeping on the job. The boss issued the final warning. On the next night he was caught with his head on his hand and his elbows on the desk. "Aha, I've caught you again," exclaimed the boss. The watchman's eyes popped open immediately and he knew what had happened. Being a quick thinking man, he said one word before looking up at the boss. The boss apologized profusely and went home. What was the one word?
The one word was "AMEN", thus making the Boss believe he was praying rather than sleeping.
cleanshortWhich one of Santa's reindeer can be seen on Valentines day?
Cupid.
cleanfunnyshortWhat is the center of Gravity?
The letter V.
crazyfunnyshortYou meet Dracula and his new girlfriend at a bar, you ask how they met. What is Dracula’s response?
It was love at first bite.
cleanfunnyWhat did Adam say the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve!
cleanshortWhat jumps higher than a building?
All animals can jump higher than a building. Buildings do not jump.
