Clean riddles

animalcleanfunny

Swimming in the ocean

If you were swimming in the ocean and a big alligator attacked you, what should you do?
Nothing. There are no alligators in the ocean.
93.39 %
38 votes

cleanshort

Red through and through

Red through and through, it has no mouth. But it eats many things; it fears water but not wind.
Fire.
94.24 %
44 votes

cleanfunnyshort

Like a football player

Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?
Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
93.55 %
39 votes

cleanshort

Karl Marx

Why was Karl Marx buried at Highgate Cemetery in London?
Because he was dead.
93.39 %
38 votes

cleanlogic

Smartest kid in the world

Jake and his friend Paco had very famous challenge sessions at their school. One would suggest something they could do, and the other would prove it wrong somehow. One day, Jake surprised Paco by stating: "I can answer any question in the world." Sure that he would win the challenge, Paco accepted the task of proving it wrong. He wrote up a test full of impossible questions. After a while, Jake returned the test. Paco unbelievably lost the challenge and told Jake he could indeed answer any question. How did Jake win?
For all the impossible questions, Jake simply wrote "I don't know".
93.84 %
41 votes

cleanlogicmysteryshort

The casino rooster

A man owned a casino and invited some friends. It was a dark stormy night, and they all placed their money on the table right before the lights went out. When the lights came back on, the money was gone. The owner put a rooster in an old rusty tea kettle. He told everyone to get in line and touch the kettle after he turned the lights off, and the rooster will crow when the robber touched it. After everyone touched it, the rooster didn't crow, so the man told everyone to hold out their hands. After examining all the hands, he pointed out who the robber was. How did he know who stole the money?
Because the tea kettle was rusty, whoever touched it would have rust on their hands. The robber didn't touch the kettle, therefore he was the only one whose hands weren't rusty.
87.96 %
47 votes